How to Celebrate Valentine’s Day Your Way

Valentine’s Day is often thought of as a celebration of love, but the holiday can just as easily cause extra stress, negativity, and pressure—and have a real impact on your mental wellness.

Around this time of year, we’re bombarded by unrealistic marketing messages, cultural expectations, and social pressure to either find someone or have the “perfect” date. Between overly-commercial gestures like flowers and candy, the financial pressure of dates and gifts, or just the difficult emotions these and other pressures might bring up, Valentine’s day can be a tough holiday to navigate.

Whether you’re partnered or not this year, it’s easy to feel like you’re missing out or somehow falling short. Instead, consider approaching Valentine’s Day an opportunity—both to frame your own outlook on the holiday, and to take actions that are meaningful for you.

In this article, we’ll take a peek at 3 ways to set yourself up for a positive Valentine’s Day experience, and most importantly, one that supports you and your mental wellness.

1 Take a moment to get clear on your values

Give yourself some time to journal or talk with a trusted friend about the values you care about most. If you give yourself permission to let go of external expectations, what might Valentine’s Day mean to you?

You might think of the holiday as a day to express and celebrate love—and with or without a partner, you are absolutely worthy of that love.

Whether you’re single or not, self-care and self-love is important. Not every partner wants to celebrate in the same way you do, and Valentine’s Day isn’t about someone else taking care of everything. When we take steps to supply our own needs and love ourselves, our cup is filled. With healthy self-love, we’re satisfied from within and able to give to others freely.

2 Create an atmosphere that makes you feel good

Wherever you’ll be spending time on Valentine’s Day, there are simple ways to make a more tranquil environment for yourself. What environments feel good to you?

Splurge a little on what matters to you, or work with what you have on hand. Tiny actions, like fluffing your pillows, lighting a candle, and laying out a favorite blanket can brighten your surroundings. Aromatherapy, flowers, or a bubble bath might feel like a special treat. Creating an enjoyable atmosphere is a way of honoring and holding space for your values.

3 Celebrate what you love

It’s tempting to focus on typical ways to spend Valentine’s Day, but you have as many options as you’d like to imagine to make the holiday your own. Here’s a few ideas for simple, accessible activities to make it a fun one:

·   Make a special dinner.

·   Order out for a favorite delivery.

·   Make time for a friend—not every relationship needs to be romantic.

·   Call or video-chat with someone who means a lot to you.

·   Take a parent or sibling out for a lunch date.

·   Write a letter of appreciation to yourself, and save it for a time when you’re feeling down.

·   Host your own dance party. No dancing partner? No problem—solo-dancing is a fun way to shed self-judgment and build self-confidence.

·   Connect with one of your favorite places in nature.

·   Take a favorite yoga or movement class.

·   Make a list of books you want to read, pick one, and start.

Re-framing Valentine’s Day in a way that reflects your values and priorities can help you build self-confidence. Your self-worth is intrinsic–it’s not based on anybody else, and you’re worthy of celebrating just as you are.

Sometimes it’s helpful to take a step back—if you’re looking for someone else to give you particular forms of love, attention, gifts, or experiences, remember that you can give those to yourself. Making time for yourself, creating a loving space, and doing activities you enjoy are healthy ways of expressing love on Valentine’s Day. Instead of suffering through a down day, they’ll help you re-center and recharge.

How Frankly Helps

With all the stresses life brings, it can be tough to feel healthy self-love. Working with a Frankly Care Guide can help you understand where you’re at today, and build the self esteem you need to achieve your goals.